Wednesday, May 6, 2015

May 6. Day 126. The early bird

 Dear Ibis,
You suck, you really do.
 You are South Bank's resident Cereal Pest by which I mean you love to steal a sandwich or indeed any other bread or grain. Also no chip is safe within your reach. Yes, you suck. After this morning's effort I'm not sure if I like you more or even less. This depends on whether you had a frog in your throat or if it was, in fact, a juvenile toad. If you were ridding the world of a toad, full points to you for taking one of the introduced weapons of mass destruction out of the environment. In addition, if you can survive toad poison you deserve a degree of credit for your cast iron constitution. If that was a frog, I'm less impressed. Frogs rock and we have a new princess in the world who might just be looking for a frog to kiss. I suppose amphibians are part of your diet and while you are breakfasting on that, an innocent chip is being saved but still, This sort of behaviour isn't going to win you any friends and you don't have many. What you need is better table manners, or a better PR person or perhaps both

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