They can't actually hurt you, they do an awful lot of good but really no-one likes them. At all.
In fact, many cringe at the mere thought.
That could apply to this spider I saw at Roma Street Parklands but although I am a girl I am not at all girlie when it comes to spiders. I find their webs totally beautiful.
Nope, I am talking about a far less pleasant necessary evil, the mammogram.
Yes, yes, I know they are life saving and I know I should be thankful this government-sponsored screening and I am but surely that doesn't mean I have to enjoy them does it?
I will not claim there was a spring in my step as I walked from the car park at Roma Street to my appointment but the important thing is I went.
A mammogram makes a girl feel vulnerable and unpleasant pretty much as an insect caught in a spider's web I imagine.
Strip to the waist in front of a stranger, have your breasts poked and prodded into place and then squeeze them between two giant metallic plates. Repeat.
Yep, it's just an insy, wincy bit degrading but most women understand the possible repercussions of not doing so are far, far worse. And after all if we are going to submit to a cold crochet hook up the unmentionables once every two years this is a piece of cake.
So boys in the words of our Prime Minister's "significant other" go find yourself a small female Asian doctor.
No-one is asking you to enjoy it, act like the sports wear company and Just Do It.