Parenting makes you utter phrases you never imagined possible. "Did you vomit in my shoe?" "Please don't hide in the dishwasher" or "Stop putting Lego up your nose". These things flow out of your mouth with far more ease than they really should.
Today I introduced myself to a professional colleague with the line "I'm Cheese's mother". Brie may be a name but Cheese? Seriously. The drama lecturer walked into the lecture theatre and started setting up masks just as I was leaving. We exchanged small talk. I recognised him as I'd seen him at various theatres around town. My son had pointed him out as one of his tutors, a bloke who remembers students' names by giving each a crazy nickname. My boy is cheese because that's what he'd had in his crepes on the day of the naming ceremony. As someone who is completely crap at remembering names I reckon it's pretty ingenious. I also don't think I'd be any better at remembering a student if I called her Coriander instead of Rosemary. Faces I'm good with. Names not so much but a bloke who specialises in mask work isn't likely to be able to use facial recognition. So like every photographer in the world, the only thing left to you is to say"Cheese".